Sterling Heights, Michigan · Est. 2023

Mushrooms
Beyond
Comprehension

Artisanally cultivated in our 400 sq ft basement grow room, just minutes from the I-94 on-ramp. Our fungi are hand-whispered to, spiritually optimized, and certified by three organizations we absolutely did not invent ourselves.

Triple Certified*

Mycelium-Forward

Suburb-to-Table

Scott, founder and chief mushroom whisperer

“Every spore is a story. Every harvest, a miracle.”

— Scott

✦ NOW AVAILABLE AT THE STERLING HEIGHTS FARMERS MARKET✦ THIRD CONSECUTIVE WINNER OF THE MACOMB COUNTY FUNGI EXCELLENCE AWARD✦ AS FEATURED IN: A NEWSLETTER WE SEND TO OUR FAMILY✦ RATED #1 MUSHROOM IN OUR GARAGE BY US✦ NOW AVAILABLE AT THE STERLING HEIGHTS FARMERS MARKET✦ THIRD CONSECUTIVE WINNER OF THE MACOMB COUNTY FUNGI EXCELLENCE AWARD✦ AS FEATURED IN: A NEWSLETTER WE SEND TO OUR FAMILY✦ RATED #1 MUSHROOM IN OUR GARAGE BY US✦ NOW AVAILABLE AT THE STERLING HEIGHTS FARMERS MARKET✦ THIRD CONSECUTIVE WINNER OF THE MACOMB COUNTY FUNGI EXCELLENCE AWARD✦ AS FEATURED IN: A NEWSLETTER WE SEND TO OUR FAMILY✦ RATED #1 MUSHROOM IN OUR GARAGE BY US✦ NOW AVAILABLE AT THE STERLING HEIGHTS FARMERS MARKET✦ THIRD CONSECUTIVE WINNER OF THE MACOMB COUNTY FUNGI EXCELLENCE AWARD✦ AS FEATURED IN: A NEWSLETTER WE SEND TO OUR FAMILY✦ RATED #1 MUSHROOM IN OUR GARAGE BY US

Current Harvest

Our Sacred Varieties

Each variety is cultivated with intention, named with care, and accompanied by health claims that our lawyer has asked us to describe as “enthusiastic speculation.”

🍄
Bestseller

The Sterling Shiitake

Detroit River Vapor-Kissed

Our flagship variety, grown in the shadow of I-696 and bathed in the ambient energy of a major metropolitan area. Notes of umami, oak, and 'definitely worth it.'

Reported Benefits*

  • Reported to increase "general vibes" by up to 40%
  • May stimulate memories you haven't had yet
  • Pairs with literally anything (Scott tested this)
$18 / 4oz
🌿
Limited Reserve

Macomb Maitake

Hen of the Suburban Woods

Named after the county that made Scott who he is. This complex, layered fungus was once described by a stranger at the farmers market as 'the best mushroom I've ever had, and I've had a lot.'

Reported Benefits*

  • Clinically shown* to improve posture
  • May reverse feelings of mid-afternoon malaise
  • Scott ate these before every important decision in 2023
$24 / 4oz
New Arrival

Celestial Lion's Mane

The Cognitive Ascension Variety

A cascading, cloud-like specimen that Scott says 'practically vibrates with intelligence.' Not for the faint of heart. Or the faint of mind. Actually fine for everyone.

Reported Benefits*

  • Reported to unlock 'the other 90% of the brain'
  • Scott passed his notary exam the week he started eating these
  • May facilitate communication with deceased relatives (results vary)
$32 / 4oz

*These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, the AMA, or anyone with a medical degree. Scott has a strong feeling about them though.

Peer-Adjacent Research

The Science™

Years of dedicated research — conducted primarily on Scott and his neighbor Dave — have yielded the following remarkable findings.

94%

Vibrational Bioavailability

According to a study Scott read part of, mushrooms grown with intention have measurably higher energetic output than those grown without. Scott has a lot of intention.

3x

Enhanced Cognitive Radiance

Participants in Scott's informal kitchen study reported feeling 'sharper,' 'more present,' and 'honestly kind of great' after consuming Scott Shrooms for two weeks. Sample size: 3 (Scott, Jennifer, and their neighbor Dave).

100%

Mycelium Network Alignment

Every Scott Shrooms product is grown in direct proximity to Scott, who believes strongly that fungal organisms respond to human emotional states. This is either cutting-edge bioscience or something Jennifer described as 'not how any of this works.'

Spiritual Upside

The potential spiritual benefits of Scott's mushrooms are, per Scott, 'essentially unlimited.' He says this is 'not a medical claim, it's more of a feeling.' Our attorney agrees this is technically not a medical claim.

“The mycelium network is basically the internet, but for feelings.”

— Scott McKinney, Founder & Chief Myco-Philosopher, Sterling Heights, MI

A Man. A Dream. A Basement.

The Scott Story

Scott grew up in the shadow of Detroit, where the air smells of ambition and tire rubber. From an early age, he felt a calling — a mycological pull toward something greater than himself. His friends called it “a phase.” His wife, Jennifer, called it “what happened to the spare bedroom.”

After a decade in corporate America, Scott walked away from a comfortable career in mid-level project management to pursue his true passion: growing mushrooms in a climate-controlled room next to his water heater. He apprenticed under a mushroom elder from Macomb County and completed a 48-hour online certification program through a website that no longer exists.

Today, Scott Shrooms produces over 12 lbs of premium fungi per month, hand-delivered to the Sterling Heights Farmers Market in a cooler he also uses for fishing trips. His mushrooms have been described by customers as “surprisingly good,” “very mushroomy,” and “are these magic ones?” (They are not.)

Scott is also an avid fisherman, amateur photographer, and the self-appointed “Fungi Ambassador of Southeast Michigan.” He has given exactly one talk about this at his nephew’s school, where he was allocated twelve minutes during lunch.

Scott communing with nature, practicing his harvest energy

Scott “aligning his harvest energy” somewhere near Tawas City, MI

Scott, founder of Scott Shrooms

Scott, off-season. Jennifer took this. She did not say why.

Our Commitments

We hold ourselves to the highest standards. We wrote these standards ourselves.

🌱

Substrate Integrity

We source only the finest organic growing medium from a supplier in Ohio. We don't know much about them but their website looked good.

💧

Intentional Hydration

Every fruiting block is misted by hand, by Scott, who often hums while doing so. The mushrooms have not complained.

🧘

Energetic Purity

Scott maintains a strictly positive mindset in the grow room. Arguing is not permitted within 15 feet of the fruiting chambers.

🏡

Hyper-Local

From our basement to your table. We are, definitionally, as local as it is possible for a mushroom to be.

From Spore to Soul

The Scott Shrooms Process

01

Spore Selection

Scott selects only the most spiritually advanced spore cultures, sourced from a vendor on Etsy with 97% positive reviews.

02

Inoculation

Each bag is inoculated with care, intention, and a sterile glove box Scott built himself using a YouTube tutorial.

03

The Waiting

The mycelium colonizes for 2–4 weeks. Scott checks on them daily. They seem to appreciate it.

04

The Harvest

Mushrooms are harvested at peak freshness, packaged with locally-sourced kraft paper, and delivered in Scott's fishing cooler.

Word of Mouth

Lives Transformed

Real reviews from real people who definitely exist.

I bought these mostly to be polite but genuinely — I put them in a pasta and my husband thought I'd taken a cooking class. He doesn't know about Scott. I'm going to let him continue thinking that.

Brenda K.

Sterling Heights, MI · Two-time customer

Scott told me the Lion's Mane would 'open new neural pathways.' I don't know if that happened but I did finally organize my junk drawer the same week, so I'm not ruling anything out.

Dave M.

Neighbor · Informal Study Participant

I found Scott through the farmers market. He was very passionate. He talked to me for about 25 minutes. I bought the mushrooms mostly so I could leave. They were extraordinary. I came back.

Patricia H.

Warren, MI · Now a regular

My therapist says I shouldn't attribute emotional breakthroughs to food. My therapist has not tried the Maitake.

Mike T.

Utica, MI · Unsigned endorsement

I asked Scott if these were organic. He said 'they're beyond organic.' I don't know what that means but I bought three bags.

Lisa W.

Shelby Township · Converted skeptic

Five stars. The mushrooms are great. Also Scott lent me his parking space while I loaded my car and he really didn't have to do that. Good man.

Greg F.

Clinton Township · Loyal customer

As Seen In

The Sterling Heights Gazette
Michigan Fungi Enthusiast Monthly
Dave's Blog
Jennifer's Instagram (Private)
The Macomb County Shopper

Come Find Us

Where to Get Your Shrooms

We bring the fungi to you — or to a folding table three spots down from the lady who sells essential oils. She and Scott have agreed not to make eye contact.

🏪

Sterling Heights Farmers Market

Saturdays 8am–1pm, April–October. Look for the hand-lettered sign and the man who will tell you more than you asked for.

📦

Local Pickup

Arrange pickup directly from Scott. He'll text you when the harvest is ready. He will also text you a photo of the harvest. Multiple photos.

🤝

Select Restaurants

One restaurant. They asked Scott to stop calling them 'our flagship culinary partner' but have not asked him to stop delivering mushrooms.

The Spore Report

Join the Mycelium

Subscribe to our newsletter for harvest updates, mushroom philosophy, and the occasional fishing photo Scott insists is relevant.

No spam. Unsubscribe anytime. Scott will be a little hurt, but he’ll understand.